Short Funny Quotes About Marriage

Short Funny Quotes About Marriage

Marriage can be sweet or sour, the most beautiful gift and the most horrible torture. Whatever it is, it definitely is a big part of life and as such has created some great thoughts and quotes. Here are some of my personal favorites!

Many a man owes his success to his first wife and his second wife to his success. Jim Backus I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste. David Bissonette I’ve sometimes thought of marrying, and then I’ve thought again. Noel Coward, 1956   A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished. Zsa Zsa Gabor   I’m an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house. Zsa Zsa Gabor   When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. Sacha Guitry   Marriage is like pi - natural, irrational, and very important. Lisa Hoffman   She’s a lovely person. She deserves a good husband. Marry her before she finds one. Oscar Levant to Harpo Marx upon meeting Harpo’s fiancee Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe. Jackie Mason Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside desperate to get out. Montaigne After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can’t face each other, but still they stay together. Hemant Joshi By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll be happy. If you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher…and that is a good thing for any man. Socrates A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. Lana Turner Marriage is a great institution, but I’m not ready for an institution. Mae West